I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
