i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
