why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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