I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
