I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
