I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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