I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize