wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
