We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
