So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
