I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I need to sanitize my soul.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
