I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
she was so not down for the gang bang
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
