that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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