Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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