ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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