yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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