Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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