Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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