At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
