i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize
