you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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