11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
