yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
