I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize