How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
