He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
