i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize