I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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