Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
