I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
