you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
