addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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