She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
