O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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