I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
