that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
