we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
