Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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