There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
