I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
