I molested 6 butterflies tonight
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Randomize
