The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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