well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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