It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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