i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
