He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize