u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Say something about gay babies.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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