i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
