And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize