May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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