you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
